How many of you remember your parents or teachers telling you to be quite when you had something you really wanted to say? How many of you remember getting in trouble for ” misbehaving” or Being “Heard and Seen” rather than “Seen and not heard”. For every one of those experiences, a part of yourself was born or added too.
In other words, If you were experiencing something as a child you needed help with, and the adult “caring” for you denied you the expression, a part would have been born that experienced not being “cared” for. Furthermore, you would have learned that the one who loves you and cares for you shows it in a disrespectful way to you. Unknowingly of course, They were simply repeating what was done with them. Never the less, not listening and not taking action to assist you as a child nurtures feelings of unworthiness. It literally teaches the child how not to communicate, honor and love oneself.
Many of us have learned this way and paid it forward in some way to our children or others. The pattern only stops when we stop it by taking the actions that facilitate something different. Until then we repeat the pattern with every relationship in our life, in one form or another. Yep you heard me correctly. So when you have the feeling of anger or Joy and everything in-between, it’s because you already have that feeling within from something you have experienced in the past. No one is giving it to you AKA, “doing it to you” or making you feel it” now.
So here’s the Ah Ha moment of this relationship advice, when you feel like someone is making you “mad” or any other emotion, they are truly just reminding you of something you have already experienced. If it is anger or any of the denser emotions similar to anger, those parts of yourself that were denied the ability express and be heard are re appearing with the hope of expressing it now. The shift is recognizing it when the trigger occurs. You have to stop the projection of the emotion onto the person who reminded you of the original experience. In that moment the person who you think did it to you is standing in for the person you first had the issue with. Yep there it is…Ah Ha Moment.
So if your mad at your husband or wife for “doing it to you”, you might very well be talking to your mother or father through all of the feelings that you weren’t able to express to them as a child. To this day, have never expressed to them because of the pattern that continues to repeat. Now is the time to wake up within the patterns, embrace all of your own feelings by getting into relationship with every part of yourself, remembering it’s your feeling. No one gave it to you or did it too you, it was simply an experience you had. With in every experience you have, a feeling is experienced and the expression of the feelings are paramount to a healthy relationship with yourself and then with all those in your life.
There are specific tools to use and knowledge to discover when it comes to walking this path. It is a journey of Unconditional love  from the observer perspective, inviting every victim part to safely step forward from conditional love and learn a different way of life.

Thank you for sharing in another present moment experience of our Beautiful world.

Love and Light Susan Newton

www.susanfaynewton.com