Have you ever had an emotional response to someone or to something that didn’t make any sense? A reaction or feeling that seemed out of proportion to the actual circumstance? Have you ever felt a strong connection to someone that seemed amazing and compatible, but within a few months time unfolded into kayos, abuse and incompatibility? Do you attempt to explain and express what you ‘re feeling and experiencing as others frequently don’t understand at all what you’re talking about? Have you had people say things to you that seemed irrational and over reactive in the context of the situation? This is the unconscious/conscious inner world projecting in to the conscious/unconscious physical world.
Truth be told, the unconscious inner world has been running the show for a long time. Much of what we have been experiencing in our outer world are the outcomes and results of the unconscious inner world, founded on history and experiences of our lineage. Becoming more conscious occurs as we choose to be more aware of how we’re thinking, speaking, behaving, feeling, and acting. As we become the observer, we lift ourselves out of the unconscious world both within and without. Much of our outer offerings are being projected from within. Every experience we have is a part of who we are. Those parts take on strong personas with regard to what they encounter through their experiences. As we grow, the parts feeling unsafe and threatened through the experiences they’re encountering, often became suspended in time, stunted in growth and maturity. The outcome is often withdrawing into the self and creating manipulative behaviors to protect and create a false feeling of safety. Thus, learning to deal with the physical world from the survival state of victimhood.
As this occurs the parts in survival enter into unconscious states of denial and learn behaviors that aren’t supportive of self. Self love in these situations becomes more about self protection founded in fear. The fear itself is founded on feelings of being unloved by parents and care givers. The caregivers, have missed the boat on how to care, support and attend to your emotional needs through appropriate communication skills. These are the very people who are supposed to love you the most and nurture your natural ability to continue loving and supporting yourself. Most often, they are simply passing on, paying forward, what they learned as they were cared for growing up. In other words, doing the very best they can do with what they were shown and taught through their experiences. Thus the lies of not being worthy, not being good enough, not having anything of value to share and the biggest lie of all, what I am experiencing and feeling in my body doesn’t matter.
This is taught via what you experience with those who continue to tell you they love you. Thus setting up a conditional definition of love, based on other people’s needs rather than their unconditional love and respect for you as a unique and beautiful individual. The conscious knowing of being worthy, deserving, valuable and special in your own unique way, is over shadowed by what you’re experiencing through the choices of those taking care of you. The result is the need to numb yourself in order to stop the pain you experience on a heartfelt level by having to experience these lies. Defense mechanisms are created as a sort of anesthesia providing an unconscious state of being to avoid the pain of the lies. Because we’re children, it is out of our control to stop this from happening. In this way, as a child, you are truly somewhat if a victim of circumstances.
Every generation has the opportunity to end these old patterns. My goal in sharing is to address everyone from where they are. Whether you are a newborn or on your death bed in you hundreds, where you are is beautiful. Simply stated where you are, “IS WHAT IT IS.” All of it, everything you’ve ever been or done is your foundation in that moment. Everyone who has come before you and all they have been and done are a part of you and have created a spectacular platform from which to function. It’s a “Come As You Are Party”… ALL of who you are. NO judgments. If you have judgments, great let’s talk about them. Lets communicate with those parts who learned to judge themselves and others so they can learn something different. Help them wake up in the unconscious inner and outer world of lies and into a conscious inner and outer world of honesty and solutions for success and a peaceful tomorrow. In this way we can honor ALL of the past, using it to create successful and empowered tomorrows that unite everyone’s unique and special offerings.
The truth is of course, who you are and what you are feeling is of utmost importance. Anything other, are lies based on the perceptions the parts of you have of their experiences. As we mature physically, these parts often remain emotionally immature, suspended in time living unconsciously in the inner world and projecting victim thoughts, words, behaviors, feelings and actions into the outer worlds. Thus how it’s possible to have grown adults who have obviously grown and matured physically, yet are stunted and immature emotionally. Analogy bridges the gap between the unconscious and conscious world.
Unless we become aware of all of our parts through our own observation, the parts of our self that are emotionally stunted, literally dysfunctional, project into the outer world and show up all around us. They show up around to get our attention, letting us know they’re still there and they would like our help to become whole and functioning as one again. Even more interesting, the history of our lineage shows up through us as well. We literally carry it in our DNA. We were created, generation after generation, one from the other over the course of time by those who came before us. It seems as though unresolved emotions continue to re appear in form, until someone does the work to embrace and interact with the emotional parts in a healthy way. Healthy in this context means acknowledging and communicating in an unconditionally loving, honoring, respectful manner. recognizing from the stand point of ” it is what it is,” rather than judging it to be good, bad , right or wrong. As well as, empowered and strong enough to set boundaries through communication leading to resolution and solutions. Empowered enough to say “stop, enough is enough, let’s find a more useful way.”
The parts of our self and lineage needing to be addressed have missed out on growing and maturing in the physical world. Literally rendering aspects of who we are dysfunctional and separate from the whole of what and who we are capable of becoming. Quite literally, often these parts are not able to function in a respectful way, using communication skills that facilitate cohesive successful lasting relationships with self and others.
Using analogies from the physical world becomes the bridge for the parts existing in the unconscious world to be valued , through acknowledgement and re connection with the core self. After being acknowledged by the self through your recognition and communication with them, the emotional parts in the unconscious world now have a voice to communicate through you (as one with you), coming into consciousness and expressing to those you are in relationship with. Those in your life are then able to have something to relate to in understanding what you’re experiencing and how it feels.
When individuals are suffering in some way physically, those around them actively address the issue and do what it takes to understand to the best of their ability and get it taken care of. Emotional wounding often goes unnoticed, shunned, denied, and abused. Further damaging the original wound by perpetuating what created it in the first place. The goal is to assist people in dealing with and healing their emotional worlds in a successful and unconditionally loving manner, just as you would address a physical wound.
As an example if you were going in for surgery, the process might look like this:
- Observance and awareness of your physical body: you are feeling a little off
- Desire to heal: you seek to find out what the problem might be
- Others listen: the professional you go to for assistance listen: test and give feedback for solutions to come back to whole health
- Integrating Knowledge: you use the knowledge shared to come up with a solution
- Choice: you make a choice to take the actions that will bring change to the physical issue
- Preparation for the solution: as an example, if surgery is required, you make sure you get the best care. Anesthesia and pain meds are required so you don’t suffer unduly. Doctors and nurses ask you regularly what your pain level is so they can accommodate the pain level appropriately because they are unable to feel the pain you experience in your body. you know ahead of time what you’re getting into and plan for some down time following the procedure to accommodate the dysfunction of the healing physical parts of your body until they are able to function again. Rehabilitation might be necessary. Pain meds and after care might be necessary.
- Living through the process: you have faith and knowing that what you are doing will help you feel better and heal to a more functional whole state of being. You are grateful for all those assisting in the process. You are conscious through your awareness, observance and communication of how you are feeling through the process.
- Recovery: you expect to feel a little off and have to rest more than normal and implement actions to care for yourself in this state. Others take time to care through calling, sending, offering and communicating.
- Back to normal: you would be healthy again and whole in a different way that before, grateful for the ability to function more efficiently.
Using an analogy to express an emotional wound, allows you to acknowledge the part of yourself that has been suffering. Because you have to think of a way to describe it to someone by using a physical example they can relate to, you immediately validate the part of you that was ignored originally and continued to be ignored by you as you matured. (because that’s what you were taught to do) Now you’ve got a way to express to those around you what your experiencing in a way they are able to relate. The goal and hope being, it will bring you into relationship with the people you care about most, as well as all future relations on their way into your presence. Because you are simply expressing and communicating, there is no judgment involved. Caring and compassion now become possible as people have a way to understand what you are experiencing even though they can’t feel what you’re feeling. Even if it doesn’t make sense to them within the context of the situation, they now have a way to relate because you took the time to acknowledge and get into relationship with yourself and express it to them. Actions like this facilitate effective communication and change through reconnection, both with all of your parts and everyone you interact with.
Connecting the unconscious world to the conscious world through analogy is a form of conscious communication that reestablishes the loving connection we had when we were born. Our connection to God is natural and necessary in order to function as a whole and beautiful spiritual being. It’s a remembrance with the unconditional love God has for us. As we remember the value we have to share and offer through honesty and unconditional love for ourselves and others , lies creating the illusion of separateness can no longer exist as a part of our worlds . This is an invitation to wake up in the unconscious world within, as well as the unconscious world running out of us as a projection in to our physical world. Know as you begin to address the emotional wounds they may require the same care and process you would take with physical wounds. It’s our heart effected with regard to emotional wounding. Handle with care and unconditional love as you use the gift of analogy to bridge the gap between the unconscious and conscious worlds we all exist in.